Today I picked up the Southeast Missourian and found out that Linda Decker had been named head of the Foundation at St. Francis Medical Center and it blew my mind I have always resented her --first, because she is Bill Holland's sister, and she heads the Development Office at Southeast Un. and I know that he is the reason that my contract was not renewed. He was going to get the job and we did not work well together. Second, because she was a hot shot in St. Louis at Macy's and Wayne Smith hired her as at St. Francis (Both of them were without jobs in St. Louis and both of them took the top development jobs here in Cape without having any development experience because they were friends of Wayne Smith.)
Then, I thought thru this resentment. Resentment is a negative emotion felt as a result of a real or imagined wrong done. Psychologist James J. Messina says that one should identify the source of resentment first and what the person did to evoke such feel such feelings. The truth is that she has done nothing to me. Her brother has but she is not responsible for what her family members do. So I am way off base. I should wish her well. She did not have a job. Why shouldn't she take a job at Cape! This is way little of me. Apparently she has plunged in and made some things happen at there or she would not have gotten the new job!.
Resent the people who have hurt you, if you wish to continue to dwell on it. Bill Holland has turned out to be exactly what I said he would and people are getting wise to him. Give him all the rope he wants--he actually sent me a handwritten note last week begging me to come to Homecoming--I know he is hurting because he isn't raising a dime. Let that be your revenge but don't hoist that resentment on someone who never hurt you in any way.
This lecture is good for me! I need to let go of it and be able to keep from knocking her when I am asked about her. I owe her that--and I owe myself that!
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